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Literal Sandwiches

Absurdist

General James: "Where's Johnson?"

Private Ham Sandwich: "I'm not sure. Hey, do you know where Johnson is?"

Private Grilled Cheese Sandwich: "Yes, the General told him to get him a sandwich." General James: "Yes, but both of you are right here." It was then that General James realized what had happened. General James: "He must've went to get me a *real* sandwich." Captain Real Sandwich: "But I'm right here, sir." General James: "Then by God, where the hell is he?!"

Military Food Wordplay