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Animals Jokes

111 jokes

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Alligator in a Vest

What do you call an alligator in a vest?

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Bear in Billings

A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana...

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Bear's Big Pause

A bear is sitting at a bar.

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Bears Eating Clown

Two bears are eating a clown.

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Bee Work Schedule

What time do bees clock off work?

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Beware of Dog

Upon entering a little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying "DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!" po...

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Big Nostrils

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?

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Blind Deer

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

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Buffalo Farewell

What did the momma buffalo say to the baby buffalo on his first day of school?

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Cat Criminal

What did the fat cat go to prison for?

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Cat Scream

What does a cat say when you step on its tail?

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Catching a Polar Bear

How do you catch a polar bear?

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Changing Lanes

Why should you never drive on a highway next to a chameleon?

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Chicken Coop Doors

Why do chicken coops only have two doors?

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Chicken Motives

I dream of a better world.

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Chicken Sedan

Why do chicken coops only have two doors?

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Colorblind Dog Poem

Roses are grey, violets are grey.

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Cow's Last Words

A farmer is about to slaughter a cow. He walks up to the cow, but the cow catches on and starts runn...

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Dirty Double-Crosser

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross the road again?

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Dog Interview

A dog walked in for a job interview today.

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Dog Poem

A poem from a dog.

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Dog's Age

What does a dog become after it is six years old?

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Duck Puns

Here are a few duck jokes for you:

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Eats, Shoots, and Leaves

A panda walks into a bar.

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Elephant Diarrhea

What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?

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Elephant Hygiene

What do elephants use for tampons?

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Elephant Measurements

What did the male elephant say to his buddy when a female elephant passed by?

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Elephant Sound

What is the difference between a pub and an elephant fart?

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Elephants in a Fridge

How do you get two elephants into a refrigerator?

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Exploding Monkey

What do you call an exploding monkey?

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Fast Lion

Why did the lion win the race?

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Favorite Zoo Animal

My favorite animal at the zoo is the gorilla.

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Fish Jokes Collection

Here are a few fish jokes...

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Fish Tank

Two fish are in a tank.

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Fish in a Tank

Two fish are in a tank.

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Floating Animal

What animal floats the best?

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Frog Breath

How long can a frog hold its breath underwater?

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Frog Psychic

A male frog goes to a psychic.

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Giraffe in a Bar

A man and a giraffe walk into a bar and get wasted.

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Goldfish in a Tank

Two goldfish are in a tank. One looks at the other and says,

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Gorilla Nostrils

Why are a gorilla's nostrils so big?

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Grasshopper Named Dave

A grasshopper wanders into a bar and sits down.

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Gray with Trunk

What is gray, has a trunk, and big ears?

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Hamster Wheel

My hamster died today.

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Healthy Anteaters

How come anteaters never get sick?

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Hiding Elephants

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

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Horse House

I built a house for a horse today.

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Horse Shakespeare

To neigh, or not to neigh...

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Hungry Bird

Why did the bird go to the restaurant?

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Immobile Dog

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Showing 50 of 111 jokes

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