"If I didn't laugh, I'd cry."
We've all said it. When life gets overwhelming, tragic, or scary, our instinct is often to crack a joke. Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, was deeply interested in this phenomenon. In his 1905 book Jokes and Their Relation to the Unconscious, he laid out the theory that humor is one of the highest forms of psychological defense.
The Ego and The Superego
According to Freud, the Superego is the part of our psyche that enforces rules, morality, and societal standards. The ID is our primal, impulsive side. The Ego is caught in the middle, trying to balance the two.
Freud believed that humor allows the Ego to bypass the strict censorship of the Superego. It allows us to express forbidden thoughts (aggression, sexuality, fear) in a socially acceptable way.
Humor vs. Wit
Freud distinguished between "wit" (clever wordplay) and "humor" (coping with reality). He argued that humor is a way for the Ego to protect itself from suffering.
When we joke about a trauma or a fear, we are refusing to be crushed by it. We are asserting our control over the situation. Freud called this the "triumph of narcissism"—the refusal of the self to be wounded by the external world.
Gallows Humor
This theory explains "gallows humor"—jokes made by people in desperate or hopeless situations. By laughing at the terrifying thing, we diminish its power over us. It transforms a passive, victimized state into an active, rebellious one.
As Freud wrote: "Humor is not resigned; it is rebellious. It signifies not only the triumph of the ego but also of the pleasure principle, which is able here to assert itself against the unkindness of the real circumstances."
Is It Healthy?
Modern psychology largely agrees with Freud here. Using humor to cope with stress (often called "adaptive humor") is linked to better mental health and resilience. However, if used to avoid dealing with emotions entirely ("avoidant humor"), it can prevent healing.
The key is balance. It's okay to laugh at the darkness—as long as you eventually turn on the lights.